Can Reparenting Yourself Help Ease Anxiety?

By April, Lyons MA, LPC

It may seem like everyone but you has this adulting thing figured out. In reality, this is far from the case. Anxiety disorders are the most prevalent mental health issue on the planet. Plenty of folks are winging it when it comes to being a functional adult. A big part of this reality stems from problems that have roots in childhood.

Your upbringing can cause emotional wounds that are difficult to identify. If you’re wallowing in unproductive patterns that produce a steady flow of anxiety, it could be a sign that you need some serious self-healing. It could mean you need some reparenting.

What is Reparenting?

This is not automatically about blaming your parents or other caretakers. The simple fact is that your needs were not properly met during your childhood. As a result, you’re caught up in unhealthy thought and behavior patterns in adulthood. But it’s never too late to give yourself the compassionate care you have deserved all along.

If you were not effectively parented in your earliest days, you might internalize that treatment as a statement of your value. Your parents did not treat you like you were worthy of love, kindness, and attention. In turn, you grew up feeling unworthy. You enter into friendships, jobs, and relationships with an unspoken expectation to be neglected. Understanding these connections allows you to step up and be the loving parent you’ve always wanted.

What Does All This Have to Do With Anxiety?

One possible cause for high anxiety is having childhood issues (or trauma) that were never resolved. Let’s say you weren’t nurtured and cared for in the way you needed. As an adult, you may lack the coping skills to deal with life’s inevitable ups and downs. You regularly struggle with feeling overwhelmed and stressed. This is fertile ground for an anxiety disorder to take root. Perhaps one or more of the following trends sounds familiar:

  • Feeling depressed and suffering from low self-esteem

  • Negative self-talk

  • Perfectionism

  • Difficulty connecting with new people

  • And, of course, anxiety

Reparenting helps us feel safer as we confront and address our emotions. From there, it becomes easier to recognize underlying causes while developing positive behavior patterns.

What Does Reparenting Look Like?

Connecting to Your Inner Child

Journaling is an excellent tool for keeping track of what your inner child is telling you. Allow yourself to identify all the negative emotions you’ve suppressed since childhood. It can be painful, but it’s the path toward positive change.

Practice Self-Compassion

There’s nothing stopping you from bestowing upon yourself the treatment you didn’t get in your younger days. Provide all the love and respect that you need.

Set Boundaries

Practice saying “no” and carving out time to prioritize your own needs.

Move Past Blame

You didn’t do anything wrong, so the time for self-blame is over. As for your parents and caretakers, forgive them and release resentment. You don’t have to condone their choices, but you can free yourself from being fixated on them.

Practice Self-Care

Maintaining a daily self-care regimen can serve a few important purposes:

  • Firstly, when you manage your sleep patterns, eating choices, exercise routine, and stress management, you build resilience which reduces anxiety symptoms.

  • Also, it enhances your reparenting skills.

  • Finally, this commitment is a daily reminder that you are absolutely worth the effort.

Learn More About Reparenting

This can be challenging work. Reparenting yourself under the guidance of a skilled therapist can make a huge difference. It also adds more of the nurturing and mentorship you are craving. To learn more about relieving anxiety via reparenting, I invite you to reach out to talk soon.

Learn more about anxiety therapy in Colorado. Serving Boulder, Longmont, Denver.